Epiclytolstoy

V

2008-08-19T22:17:00.018Z

Matt was running a bit late so it fell to Ian to pick me up

And that's me house sitting this weekend at the Meddle's

Can only hope it stays this nice

Tearing into the site after soom B road action. It worked out real well. Ian left before us and we got there an Hr ahead of his car

After some grief that I'm useless at doing stuff with tents

2 of those = a shit load of cans sneaked in....... hahahahhahaha

Camp "Brotherhood of Nod"

I don't know why we could not leave the girls to get the rest of the gear out of the van. Its been hard work for us men to put the tents up

In the car park

This was a very pleasant experience

Katy had a surprise sprung on her

not that I had chance to take the picks as it was us men folk that all went bow tie and thong.
Something about Matt and Katy being 2 yrs officially a couple.

Next day... as I got smashed drunk and went streaking alot. So I have been told.
I knew I should of trimmed down there....
Add to that after breakie I just happened to look down and see my wrist band was gone.
That would be Very bad.... Blind luck mixed with Adam checking my tent twice, it turned up inside my coat and in 1 piece to put back on. WHoooaaaaaa

Got a helium tank and some balloons. Just to aid to my special look.

That balloon was a bit pish

16th Aug 1928 was when mu gran was born, Sadly 65 odd yrs later a chump wanted to do a Festival in chelmsford.
Fast forward to 16th Aug 2008 and I am here and not up north celebrating.

Still at least the drinking part is still going on

A couple of nice scots I had a nice chat with. Gorden and er..... Lesley I think

Sarah and Emily

Must be a clown bashing them balloons out. Not that its me as I have no skill in the matter

I'm sorry for stealing a few drags from your stash on ciggies. I'll return the favour someday

There is the clown

and he anit doing that bad

Really must get me a hat like that.

Balloons have gone down Sir

Happy 80th Birthday Gran

Muse will be own soon after some welsh boys that some poon dog from everton got a tattoo of on his cock, A filth bag Utd player for those that did not get the ref:

That's game over for another night

Moscow mule to start the morning

I wonder how many city will get spanked by today

2 trips = 40+ cans

Back here later for Hot Chip, Charlatans and Chemical Brothers to finnish off. Sounds great

Think that would be moody

We got stung by a load of security. Tho they were such nice lads they let us keep the cans as long as we drank them from cups

That's a false statement

Oh la la Free bog roll with every cup O piss

its meant to be that way up

Whats that over there

Why its a dress I had to wear earlier in the month

And look who is wearing it now.....

Looks good on Ian, it is a size 18 after all

not far from a game over here. But do manage to hold it togeather

Apart from u can just see the strap of the dress under my arm

a big pic gap and its in the JJB tent

Seems I still had the dress.

Sort looks like I'm still wearing it as well. Me and drinking it gets me no wear with the ladies

I do well with the men tho

The brothers do put on a shit hot live act

Lots of luck with men

And thats a wrap. 2 Days rest and its once more into the breach for Reading 08.

FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!

Just need to sort my hair out 1st

Return of the Blog: 1 night in Prague

2008-08-08T14:14:00.022Z

Yes the blog is back for more drunken exploits. To kick off we have a trip to Prague for a Killswitch Engage gig.

1st chance Ive had to use a mirror all day

somewhere over frog land

1st thing I spotted coming off the metro. It's 1 for the Prague 9 whom should remember it. ill even have a little pop quiz for them sorted out sometime.

That's the national museum at 1 end of Wenceslas Square

The view of Wenceslas Square from the museum end

This is my Hotel its in the middle of Wenceslas Square. Done my scouting already and the bar where tonight's gig is just 3 min walk away.

I've seen better views from a toilet seat but what do u expect for free.

The Prague 9 will know this place well

just as cheap as i remember, but not as cheap seeing as the exchange rates are not great, still about 70p

Where we stayed 4 years ago nice to see the place is still standing

he was belting out some classics so i stopped by for a Pivo or 2

Shame I didn't have time to go over to the castle.

Charles bridge

The start of the bridge on the old town side

1 of the many statues on the bridge

think ill pass on that 1

Old town square

heading back to the hotel now

No fucking idea what he is doing with that. trying to teach the lobster to play most likely

German MTV and she was a hottie talking about slipknot

It's Prague's No.1 £1 shop

Ques

need to adjust the brightness

Cynic, the opening act not to bad at all As I lay dying are to follow

Been a long time. Forgot what its like to be in a hot sweaty room full of smoke

1 JD and coke, 2 vodka's and a can of redbull. Came to about 225 Kč

that'sbout £9. Not that cheap really. But it was double shots so there is some value for money. Which will show in about 6 pictures time.

1 of the few peps i got talking to

I really should of talked to her more. Oh well yet 1 more escapes my vile clutches

Ah-ha Killswitch are up and this is were its very blury. For both my memory and the pictures

Its not game over yet, but its is for the camera. i did have spare battery's. However in my in my intoxiced state I put 1 of the dead batts back in and lobed the rest.

Not much else happend. Was the Best gig Ive been to. Very small and intimate. As a goodbye got a punch in the arm from the girl Nice. 1 day i may even work up to getting a peck on the cheeck.

next up will be V festival snaps. Untill then toodles

Reading: End Game

2008-02-01T15:26:00.000Z

Yes this is late so screw me. I have been doing other uninteresting things with my life of late.
Add 2 that sooner or later I was going to lose the camera in a drunken heap. This may be the last post until I get a new camera sorted out If ever. Dumped the tent, it smelled too much, Tho I was unhappy with Raff for later flattening it. It was going to be home to some African refugees
"Happy Trails"

Ad is there somewhere behind Raffs hat
A big hole needed filling. And thats all 4 me and yes i Ate the lot. Took that long the other 3 had to go for dumps 1 after the other. Not me

3 Different sweets

Pepsi Max

1 Triple Whooper No Mayo

1 x 3 Chicken strips

Onion Rings

Fries

My bowl problems are much better now, but still suffer the rare flareup.

Pure dirt thats what I say
AAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA
End Game.

Reading Day 5

2007-11-26T12:46:00.000Z

Fuck knows who these chumps are all I do know is they were 1st up in the tent Gallows were playing in later so I just wanted to check them out.
Big miskate as I lost £60 and a bank card.
What The Fuck... again at least I can be get a sub off somone. But still its Download all over again.

Minus losing my trousers

After having no luck looking for the cash me and raff head back, but not before
Sleaze
Slack sleaze she is well average
Resting up till later and caught a bit of spurs getting sleaze on the rags
a view from the toliet block
Ad, Emily and myself went to see Fallout Boy
With Spiderman in the crowd I felt safe

Nice mother and daugther combo
We hung around for this lot and id soon be off to catch Gallows

Curse the bar tent. It had no Rosé. So red it is. not that the mature in the shot has anything to do with it

are you sure about being near the front ladys as its going to get crazy
Which it did
to the point where my feet would be crushed if not for steel toe capped workmans boots.
had to fight tooth and nail to keep just off front row it was that mad
Hence look at the sweating on my hat.

Back at the camp it was about 10ish and flag burning time
Goodbye...... Camp Twat
queueing for the silent disco, this bint pushed infront of me with her slag mates. So this is my revenge, and i told her Id wank over the picture later. Not that i have yet
The queueing was too much for this guy
Made new friends from Cornwall, 2guys and 3 girls. lost them after a while as i didn't feel right to follow them all when they went for fags.

Would not of made a move on this Cornwall lass as i simple was not destroyed enough
Just didn't have the same feel as the last time
Tho this is a highlight
Can headbang now without fear of the headphones coming off
Id ran out of Vodka and coke too. So the sub for the Drink of Doom was vile and noneffective

Its about 1 and they are still queueing a mile to get in HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH suckers
As its the last night lots of burning goes on
Ad and myself checked out this tent burning crowd.
Then a few of us gathered at the toliets. A mass had some tunes banging out of the metal and plastic

Was praying 1 of them chunps would fall into the shitter
Moving on
No White Wedding for this trannie

Hot soup and bread for some.

It also plays a tune

Squeezeing out the last bit of battery power on the fake Ipod. All of us that was left, got down to "How Soon Is Now" by The Smiths... So Borth can now go cream yourself
A pond of filth
Daylight has broken and so is mental control over sleep. need a few before we set off

Reading Day 4

2007-11-09T16:36:00.000Z

Saturday morning is here and tonight I plan to have "socks on cocks"
Note the best laid plans can always go tits up
Morning Carnage

The Joke tent in the sense if ur not 1st in and outside like us u can not hear any of the cracks
Tho you can get ur sleaze on
No food for me just yet, bad guts and all
A T-shirt for Ian
Curse you Borth and your Vodka/Water technique.

What a said looking flag
Girls better watch out
These commando's will be lurking in a bush near you
Im a bit fucked, but at least City only took 1 up the Arse

My bad spill on Sam, Sorry
Inventiev idea by Ad there, in the same vein as Tanner.
The only crime is we didn't wear our hats like this more often

Raff enjoying the evening sun

Things are getting very hazed over now

Playing up for my camera.
Its near to.......... GAME OVER YEAHHHHHHHHH!

Blackout. I wake up naked about 2am. Guess i didn't get that sock on after all.

Raff has a nice vid of me fucked. it might by on his myspace I will check later.

Reading Day 3..... AT LAST!!!!!!

2007-10-23T01:13:00.000Z

I want to play Bioshock but this needs to be done 1st so here it is. The long awaited Reading Day 3

I went off to find a shop for some supplys And got a pretty picture

The clouds clear off later
Feet are not my fetish
Tanner made a nice parsol out of a old umbrella. + my gaffer type

Graham had a can in his hand. Then i had the idea of pissing into a empty and putting into his hand. Would of been so funny to see him take a swig of piss when he woke up. Then im not that much of a cunt so I called the bottle someone pissed in during the night.
Hairstyle by Lisa & Sam
Graham and Chris's tent
Vokda
Tia Maria

Captain Morgan's
Sambuca
And to finish it off some Pepsi Max. Makes the Drink of Doom 07. 06 was with diet coke but I refuse to by it unless there is no choice as the cock Rooney doe's ads for coke now
Note that is not how i sneaked the bottle in. It was on the inside of the camo's
But before we head off, a drink to move out with

goes a sickly orange colour
MAN CITY
Bastards at the gate gave me a full search. Not that they found my stash and told me No Flags Allowed.
So whats that there a flag on a pole. It infury's me
Anyway were watching as the picture shows Kings of Leon

Its getting dark

Guts are still bad.

I have kept the tracks i have on my fake Ipod. Made a good impression on me

Off to get crushed going to the pisser

Soon i will be to old and lose the slim chance of ever slipping a length to a teenie.
Plenty left heheheheheheheehe
That man is wearing a wig
I can respect that now
Not this tramp tho

Thats what he is after
What a funny thing to lose at a festival
nice T-shirt. Shame the guy had no idea what it is. Guess he has never heard of WWII
Chow. not for me as i don't want to risk the guts exploding during the silent disco
Aha thats it. you can buy flags in the area and never take them back in again.

No idea now why I came back to camp twat
As im now in the que for the silent disco
took about an 1hr but made some friends on the way
Think its Baz, Matt and Gary
We all had a passion for Rage Against The Machine. I played "Know Your Enemy"

Yay we are in and its a right laff. pick between 2 channels

Hey is it working
Or am i just pissed

What the Fuck. Drink of Doom is empty.

Check out the Fulham loving Matt... Errrrr Baz..... Er maybe Gary

Failing that the sly sleaze shot to the right
its a bit blury for a bit now but no blackout on my part
"Alirght Gay"

Such a lovely couple

I didn't even ask him to look dangerous
can you believe the drink of doom is all gone. She later gets a neck on with 1 of the boys

Not long to go now

"Hello Ladies"
Even now i don't understand this picture

Time to go.
Treats

Save the rest of the flag burning till the last night hey
Cold so cold, maybe the toxic gases comeing off this in a inclosed space is not the best idea i have ever had.

Fuck it im writeing this so must of done somthing right.

Reading Day 4 to follow next week.

Im off to play Bioshock for a couple of hrs before my trip to Gran's. Billy Ocean is performing on Wed 23 Oct. So off to sleaze onto some matures

With thanks to Big Mark

2007-10-17T06:04:00.000Z

For rebuilding my PC.

Picture courtesy of Nick Austin. War photographer in action.

I'll get round to reading day 3 after I've played around with Bioshock for bit

2007-09-24T18:49:00.000Z

Computer has died a nasty death......
it may be a while before reading day 3 comes up. If i can save the old hard drive that is.

Don't Cry For Me, I Am Already Dead

Reading on a Thursday, (day 2)

2007-09-06T00:35:00.000Z

Woke up early still with bad gut rot, Damn it was bad, maybe it was a undercooked sauasge from last night adding to the fact i already was suffering.... Karma yeah right Took the chance to perv as ive not done much else today
Hence the boys appreacated it

Not that Tan was in that kinda mindset
Flag making was the main order of the day and i didn't take many pictures of it for some reason

this little beauty is going to be strapped to my back. In the style of Yoshimitsu from
Soulcalibur.
Straight edge is broken with 1 sip. AHAHAHHAHAHAHAH IM BACK BABY YEAH........
theres like 25 of us camping this yr. A record im stateing as some of the gangbangers started back in 00
Husband and Wife
Mr and Mrs

Emliy kept that from last yr. It as a scotish security guards. he gave it me as i sweet talked my way back in after being kicked out for streaking.
That would come so in handy as it really does get hot over the weekend
Much better "Camp Twat" and "Leigh Elms"
Burn Burn
Lager, voidka and breadbull

Chris loveing life
Raff with Lisa, sister to Chris
yes my hair would be that long now it i did not sell out. Im working to change that now after 2 yrs of short conforming hair. Its Graham
Ive warned you before about takeing shit pictures u twat

Not getting wrecked in case mu bowl movements start up again

nearly bed time
Oh some young girls appear. Not that im botherd talking to them ive a date with the shitter in the morning
Bedtime for me and its all over untill tomorrow.

Onward to Reading.

2007-08-28T21:51:00.000Z

The cock postman has stole my early tickets to get in on the wed. So with luck we can get some off the door from some low life. Before that we need to get there 1st. Tanners on his way And im traveling light this yr. Only 1 cooler box... No not the dyson that just happened to be in the shot

Scum heading into Southend.

Raff, fresh from laying around Spain for the past 4+ months. he has loads more shit than me so it makes for a interesting trip
Yes Ad he really does have that much stuff

And thats without the 4 of us in the car

May get to sit in the car after all as we are meeting up with the convey in Hadleigh

Ive have bad guts since Monday. Mother cooked me up a scrambled egg on toast at breakfast
1 bite out of a Chicken thing...... "I follow Thru" In a panic i check with a napkin. Yep sure enough i have (not much just enough to make it wet in the grand canyon) Much to laughter and disgust i finnish the cleanup in the carpark and we head on our merry way. With 5 or so shat stained napkins floating about.

Getting close now

Touts wanted £50 each. £10 when i bought them online. So screw that. With luck 1 of them says why don't you que up and get them. And hey what do you know he was right and were back in business after a 10 min que up. So Sleaze it up baby
We all split up and it took away to regroup for the tent building
+ stuff lugging
Of which none was mine other than tent

Work ant down yet as we have a car trip to go on yet

Seems that nats took a liking to me already
I nearly died. The walk to the car was a good 45 min as the ferry was packed out. The walk back was so much fun I was near to throwing it all into the Thames. Least i have a swig of clean bottled water Ahhhhhh.

Thursdays will be up in a few days, and we still have Fri. Sat. Sun and a little of monday to go.

A Saturday in August

2007-08-22T03:37:00.000Z

Yes ive been slow to post this, but do not fear. Reading 07 is not far away to showcase my talents. and start drinking again. As Bigman said on my B-day somthing like. "If you are planning to break straight edge you can call yourself Fake Edge"

Which it seems i am. but not today on this post. Ive tried and seem doomed to failure. Should accept my fate. At least not drink as much anyway.

Starting off for a few drinks around Ian's before heading into Southend
Young Mr Adam or Chester as he hates to be called by me.
Matthew arrived to show us his "Medium Guns"
Arty shot

Luke as well as a couple of others were around by now
Such as Mikey B
A mans place is infront of the ironing board
With a drink in his hand
Feels like a strange shirt night

Just a quicky in here before were off to the usual..... Bakers
Stuck a £20 note in. AHAHAHAHA £27 coins out. thanks
No such joy on here
Kneel before SIR WEBSTER

"MMmmmm Peach, I can eat a peach for hours"

Que was a joke but in we still went
Before that i went into this fine establisment
For A tasty Battered Sausague. you can't get them up North. Fuck knows why

Me and Luke were left behind as the rest que jumped. instead of talking to fit girls behind us we talked about Streetfighter and other related topics.

Tore upstairs for a change

They call him "The Head" or was it "The Face"... No I think it was "The Head"

Ahoy Captiano I spot
Legs
No im not dirty, i have not shaved for nearly 2 weeks
Well they are bigger than most men

Girls in skirts or short shorts. Ethier way I love it

Some crazy group danceing

Ankles really do it for me.

More "Up high down low Danceing" is On

Up High
Down low
Down real Low

She went to school. Couple of yrs lower. I tried a little But she only had eyes for another

hey Kim

he is gonna be so smashed in a few more pics

no he aint acting. The bar was being kept upright by Ian
Checkout time

Luke wanted to see Ians Cock 1 more time
And there it was
And again
Oh not that time
Maybe it was then I will leave that for you to decide.

A Mammoth week in Manchester (ish)

2007-08-07T20:12:00.000Z

This was Sunday the 29th of July. I have been trawling for something a bit special to do for (or around) my Birthday. It just so happens there is a 80s party featureing some of your 80s favourtes.

Snapped Gran a couple of times 1st off its the only way to start a blog entry from up north

I have a choice of hat attire. just to "complete the look"
Uncle Kevin was kind enough to drop us off and pick us up.
I fucked the shot up so went and really made it worse for good measure

I would get a right slateing over the course of the week about my capablites with a camera

Sporting a clean shaved look. And they didn't drink to there shame as they both admitted it would of been more enjoyable with it..... Not me tho I dont do drugs anymore

We had a mile work ahead so had some 80s tunes blasting all the way there and in the car too of course
Note the facial hair gets longer over the week. Im writing this blog on my last day off before work again becons me in. Wed 8th
They loved my choice in marching music Stage was by the lake nice an sceneic

Mbop. I think is the spelling from Finland and they were some ok warm up. Not what i was expecting at a 80s concert. Child of the 80s like me these lot
Not Toyah tho
Check the blonde wig wearing fella
Nice

And to think my camera work gets a slight unjust bratting. These shots were at full zoom.

When T'Pau came on i had to go for a piss and got chatted up by a gay that asked me who i wanted to see today. Bananrama of course, "thats what eveyone says" he was here for Belinda Carlisle. .... . he then proceeded to show me the tattoo of her on his cock. No i mean forearm.. After that i duely rain into a different pisser to the 1 he was heading to

Ironic as "Sex Talk" was being sung at the time

Jobber went for my flat cap. I had a coat should i get cold later. he did heheheheh and the old CBH came over me. pay his dues he didnt ask to wear it.
I can't decied if the jeans are 2 tight or that is overflow

Im stunned i was lead to believe my ladies were the headline act. Nope they ant
Still i will get over it as they played 4 songs i know most of the words to I was Very happy
I Heard a Rumor. being my all time fav

This guy was headbanging hence the motion blur.

Not many men would say no

Steve and rob reckon that its some bird from corrie. I was unwilling to go paparzza on her ass so this is as far as i went
i had to wait ages for this filly to turn round

YAY she did

WOW these 2 sat next to us during the H/T break. Rob and me both shoveled some sleaze there way, Soon as the acts started up again i lost the will to communictate with them
There camera was low on batterys. sadly i couldnt come to the rescue as my spare batts wouldn't fit. and thats pretty much where the banter ended.

A grild selling blankets for £17.50 HOW MUCH!!!!

Clare Grogan of Altered Images, Sang Happy Birthday at some point. touching

the talking may have ended but not the many attempets at Sleaze shots
most shots were Slack as my wolfbagged ass
I fall in love so quickly. 1 week on and she is added to the list of "what if"

All the shots of belinda are poor. sorry guess that gay got my hand shakeing

nearest thing to crowd surfing ive seen all day

on purpose and they dont like me taking these kind of pictures.

nut nuts in front of us

The closeing act of the evening... Nick Heyward

Took me 5 goes to snap this
YES i got it a spotlight on the trees

Some fire works now. its nearly home time
Jobber as Kurt Angle

Tolstoy as Jubilee

mid-week Hale carnage as Golds likes to put it. He is driving us down.

Borths fav T-shirt
OJ for me and Golds
crossings were down for 10mins + and we sat near a big group of women chain smokers
People up north seem to do that alot when i take pictures of them
S looking at stuff on Golds phone. And for those of you that don't know Golds he has lots of pictures and videos of flowers

YEAH right
as we stayed in this pub, the others made Borth run to another pub for these treats
2 Polish/Slovaks were at the bar and Borth wanted me to go over and drop the 1 polish phrase i know of "My Darling" I refused.
Unreleated to the pick a public debate insued over Poland not bordering Slovakia. I was sure it did. S txt some guff on his phone and it came back without the anwers we wanted. Warsaw is 300 odd Km from Bratislava as the crow flys. WTF thats shit. so he went on to find a map on his wap.... he showed Big man then convently lost the map. Lie.S.

Scoff
just chips and onion rings for me

Borth again swearing at my camera and im not even taking the pic
HEHEHE while Golds was standing around i sliped a menu in his pocket

I chucked all my chips at S, as i could'nt take him helping himself while i was taking this pic

All smiles tho it was in jest and i felt gulity getting the chips anyway
2nd Aug 2007. Im 25 by the calanders we live by
Borth offerd to drive up near Bury for a birthday Mogul Curry

WWP with the best yet to come

Its a old church this curry house. curry is a religion after all
not beer
Must be spicy that sauce

Like magic a chicken jalfryzi and some gunk S is eatting

Where has he gone soon as he has fin

WTF thats my Chicken Nann the bastard has been eatting

not that he cares after all he is WWP. Changed man my Ass

I fin last as standard. eatting left overs after all takes time

Alright GAY!!!

Im still hungry
No to Mcfluriees
we have desserts here

Was back at grans by 22:10 so i txt LeAnne to see how she is. As im sure she is unware of the blog address. Im still stupidly thinking we might get it on. Still at least its No where near as bad as the gut wrenching i had over her 9 yrs ago
Super Carnage as Borth put it over on his blog. + its a battle of the blogs in the sense of peps need to vote on whose blog of the friday is better. Borth should win as he gets more hits than me. tho i note he seems to have forgot to mention it on his. Other things on his mind im sure.
And No thanks to Jobber ordering me to put on 7meag pixel mode on my cam. It took well over an hr to load fridays pics so i missed some out i was gagging to sink some allied shipping in the atlantic
Mother and daugther off for a hen night. we were kind enough to tell them when borth heard about the train no show
On the bus. Big Man pointed out Trafford Crack Whores

Twice ive been now and sober. 1st time i wasn't calling "straight edge" just a 5 month embargo

bit a pin ball to pass the time
now where but a plastic cup to place my gum
Sorry dreamie barmade i couldnt get a better pic of you

i feel a chokeing challange overcome me. besides Dr Carl is around should i need him
Down in 1. Down in 1. Down in 1

Why is the floor so wet

Ah yes Steve chucked all that drink on rob
uncareing sod
This guy loved me for the Depeche Mode t-shirt im using to cover my man brests
(not brests is a injoke down South init) Upstairs dancefloor carnage
back down to win £4 from a £5 jackpot. and it was all skill with the button press when the light flashed on the cash. Try doing that well when ur pissed.

Straight edge wins again

Borths heart is soon to be crushed
Thanks to Big Man for a pic of WWP with his 1yr long Girl Sarah
More spills

Catface went that way and we were soon to follow.
A broken man getting his coat

Wheres borth

Golds found hm outside the toliets, up to his eyeballs in small talk i heard. he tells the story better
Why am i last in the cab yet in the middle. WWP didn't want to sit next to the love of his life and let me instead,
So he could have more leg room thats why
Night night
Gran was up and at 2:02 i set off for the 3hr 20min ride home.

Borth is pure inspiration.

from a broken despondent man to elation in 45mins

Shame im no good at talking to women, and not very good at taking there pictures when they anit looking ethier.

bird shit is lucky

2007-07-27T07:53:00.000Z

Yet another saturday night and we are off out for a meal and a dance of sorts, all as a excuse for Mikey B's upcoming birthday And yes im going out in the Vest
with a chav style jumper over it hehehehheeee

A 6 man cab on a sat is a rare thing indeed
KP choc dip things i gave 1 to all as a little snak

Hold up 1 or 2 fingers and if the total is odd we go Nado's. if its even we go tapas style
odd was the outcome

Adam (i prefer Chester) turned up to join us
Higgs and AD&D Less

I look quite thin in the pic, shame is a lie

the Extra hot sauce for me

No pussy mild stuff for me

"wolfbagging" came up and this Sick fucker had all sorts of weird shit in his head
And im sure he has soiled these young minds with his sick ideas
Very funny but sick sick sick

Frozen Bottomless yoghuat for me and the lads dared me to have some sauce with it

OK

Not bad but best not to mix them. and thanks to Mikey for the action shots

Off to Bakers which will prove to me a mistake for Ian
Some gulls went past and AD&D lee reckons he was hit
We all rub it in that he has and its lucky bird shit is... Or some might say Karma got him
More "straight edge" action for me

the standard drinking game

As Bakers ant dirt cheap. ive no idea what the Alchcol % of these drinks is

They seem to be enjoying it
Mikey has bigged me up to this man. He knew me as the Black Dragon

get it Down ya

Ive never played stack with the Manchester lads yet. Maybe never will

SLEAZE time
Er maybe not that must be a man in pic
oh no thats what i was aiming for

Get off my hat you perve

yeah right
thats a belt not a skirt, and does your mother know your wearing that

i dont care im having fun takeing the pictures

I was in awe of this 1 on the right

I failed in getting a face shot of her.

Hawk eye spotted Lisa. And a friend I have never had the pleasure of meeting... See you at Reading Lisa

It better not get any gaynar then this

no Mikey is not 30

That 1 in the green is. See you in 5 and a little bit yrs 30

They must make these 2 wear this get up in the hope more blokes buy there wears
it worked on Adam after the 3rd time of them asking over the course of the evening.
Pink Sambuca, £3.50 a shot mmmmm 6 x 35 i should be able to know that 1

£18.50 that set him back. And no i did not have 1 but thanks for the offer
Heading downstairs and this is where it went bad
Katie dropped Ian the week before. Im unwilling to listen to her reasoning for it let alone ask her. Ians side of the story is all i need to know. Well she was here and it sent him on a downer to the bar.
add to the misery a bouncer steamed into me and ordered i take the cap off.... Wanker
Ians plan was to drink alot until kicko out, and that is 5am

We all attempted to talk him out of it
In the end i had a chance to take a couple more sleaze shots of girls next to me at the bar. And im not 1 to miss out on a chance like that

Mikey is staying at mine tonight as his digs are up London way with Matt. So a few of us said our goodbyes and headed out and leaveing Simon and Ian to it
FIN

fancy doing some "wolfbagging" + (some unreleated airsoft)

2007-07-20T20:20:00.001Z

ops the picture loading is a bit screwed so this pic should be alot lower down. Its a nice way to open tho. Mark tuneing his Manderlin. His teacher is a hillbilly too Er

This is a week late... so sue me, ive been busy sinking allied shipping in the atlantic during WWII. Oh an work as well New velvet revolver T-shirt
Sporting Tanners new Ray Bands he has picked up for his hols.

Already he has tried to tempt me into the alcohol.
Stop trying to tempt me and TEMPT ME

Ahhh thats better a glass of J2O i forget the flavor now.

No thats not mine
Andy and his Bro, Chris. Looks loads like steve from a old post
Hey Ad makes a welcome return to the blog

Changed seating location and i bought a round of snaks in
More J2O carnage

Everyone is very unimpressed with me "straight edge" status.

Trying out more arty shots

more crisp carnage
The blonde was well worth a sleaze shot. sadly thats the best i got. Damn "straight edge"
While I was not looking ethier Tan/Ad dipped his finger in his drink and dropped the droplet of said drink into me pure clean J2O. So techniquely I've slide already. May as well go the whole hog

No as ive classed it as a unintentional slide.
Shame on them.

At least Emliy ant adding more pressure to the cooking pot of breaking the Edge
Earlyer at Tans i told him about Wolfbagging. Someone at work told me whom they told him. Its quite sick and of a sexual nature. Low and behold Tan informs Ad of Wolfbagging

Via the media of Txt message
And yes its the sort of thing u can have a good laff at
and be disgusted at the same time

For the blog i actuall googled wolfbagging and the return I got is nothing like the version i had heard at work so its made me look a right fool now if Anyone from this night looks it up as well.
These 2 didnt quite get it

Oh look thats Jade and her mate still owes Tanner £20 from way back in the early days of the blog. Oh and she is well smashed
Thats not the £20 unpaying hussy
I gave her my hat as a excuse to point the camrea at her

HHEHEHEHHEheheheeeeee
Oh and Ad got me to agree to break "straight edge" at reading when we get there on the Wed with the Drink of Doom. . but i have to cook him his Steak i have promised everyone thats there on Wed first. WHAT he dont trust me cooking drunk. I duely reminded him of Ryan and Carla's hen and stag do a few yrs back. Rustled up a good feed for alot of people with only a few choice cookable items.
Winding down now and this did indeed smell a tasty drink
Thankfully her drunk ramblings are away from us now

To Hadleigh Kebab shop
I should blackmail some cash out of Tanner. This is slack proof he is commiting a crime
I love the gig they make these guys wear.

Chips and pitta for me
Andy said a donner wrap is the way to go. it does look edable at least. And im sober
back to Tans for my bike

He split some drink and had to clean it up HAHAHHAHaaa
And he is still hungry. his donner wrap and some of my chips werent enough for him.
Thats me off home and asleep about 1:50 then at 2:10 i get woken up by Borth. I shit myself thinking someone is standing over me. ( I got Gallows, Abandon Ship as a ringtone put on that day so still getting used to it). The banter was short and along the lines of his blog stealing my ideas, which i dont mind to much. I see it as idol worship
After returning to sleep its time for some airsoft in Kent. Not drinking made it easy to roll out of bed

The usual Macdonalds breakfast

Well u can see this site from miles away.

Its loads better upclose

We are chinese today.

Big Mark ant 100% yet but its good to see he is out for a game or 2
I beleive thats a dragonov sinper rifle. expensive as well

I had a encounter with some stinging nettles
Lunch time
And Nick sporting a real mans camera

Fuck me, thats high
I got shot in the foot standing behind that van. Doh

Nice regen idea. when the clock is blue we can go back out. when its orange we have to wait.
1 of me 2 Eagles .50

Snap snap.

Brush and a Brithday

2007-07-07T02:25:00.000Z

Well nearly a month after Download, im still "Straight Edge" + Tonight is my 1st test as its the 1st time I have been on a night out since. To The Pink Toothbrush for Simons birthdayIm on my bike but I have to do the TM mirror shot.
Stood in the que for a little while and after a game on the old Arcade machine I bumped into Steve. After the shot I explained the old trick of pretending to take his picture but really I was after the 2 Ladies. Not a bad way to start hey
The Birthday Boy himself
There are a few poor shots like this tonight. What can we blame it on:
1. Im sober
2. I only had the batteries in the camera and no spares so was needing to hold off on the flash
3. Im just shit at taking pictures
Take your pick and if u can think of No.4 please do tell

Nick here is a pro camera man, and does offer me some advice later in the evening.

Im only pineing a little for the sweet effects of alchool
The corset looked much nicer in the flesh
more bad camera work from me

Thats better
The 1st of 2 rounds i bought. A Fosters for Steve and water for me
He hated it as he was on Strongbow. Still it did get put down eventually
Hey its Big Mark, and he is walking without aid. with a limp mind.

1 ponders that i just don't photograph well, even sober

Thats a better picture of simon and his future wife Ally ( soiry if i zpell it wrog )
I have a hat just like that
And no i haven't given in im just holding it for someone
Martin arrived sporting the vest look rather better than i do.
This fine specimen had a LED belt, and sported some erotic dance moves in the cage. As much as i would like to of taken a point blank sleaze shot my soberness held me back

Tho my keen eyes caught her later on in the evening. HHAHAHAHAAHHAhahahahaaaaaa....
Why did i post this 1 i have no idea, its a crap attempt
Oh this makes up for it Men in a go-go cage thing

Note the Girl had a bow in her hair which i well liked
a man in the cage with glow sticks.
Curse those hands for being in the way
round 2 of 2 the Sice for the birthday boy and J2O for me.
Somehow i doubt Baron Teapot will be doing the vodka shot with water trick

Stockings and suspenders, A nice look would of been better if i had the balls to of put the flash on
Mark considered getting pissed, then with wisdom beyond his yrs stuck with the redbull. Another Ally is Nicks friend he introduced me to at some point earlier.

U can see the air on that 1

As Borth would say " Banter "

Nicks idea, Personally I don't do these type of shots
very romantic
We did chat about the 2 M's..... Music and Manchester. 42s, 5th ave and the Ritz popped up

I took a fare few of trash shots

Well I can not really describe this in words other than "Leanne" was the 1st girl i had a crush on at school way back in yr 11 (thats 1997-98) Only few things of importance i don't want to bore you all with on here.... Ok just 1 i ate a Lemon to try and impress her in geography once. And history would put that down to a failure. I knew she was in here as i spotted her and Sister in the Que outside. And as she was right next to me at the bar, I knew I had to at least ask how she has been. It went quite well, she asked me to pop over where she was later.
Before that i needed to work up the courage to go over. After all i am sober you know

A few words from Nick certainly helped that endeavor

I duely did and i can honestly say that the 20 mins or so of chat we had was the most we ever talked before and 1 can of red strip later I got her Mobile No. So thats not a bad haul at all is it now
the 2 pics were taken when Posion, Alice Copper was on. A song they were waiting for.
My hat does look better on Ally than me

Nick says i should read the instructions for my camera, I would tend to agree with him.

As those 2 choice shots are from somthing he told me about
Its about 01:30 and this is the 1st time ive seen Steve move

Prodigy was the sound and dacncing was the aim
Martin sporting colourful footwear

Thanks Ally for that fine figure of a man poseing

System of a down... Chop Suey

Steve dropped his coat..... again

Well i must be sober, sober and pondering the events of the evening

time to roll out
A few of the crew went for nosh. i declined as mother has a pizza she wants me to eat. So off i go
I had 2 belts on just in case.

Oh and Leanne has txt me already. HHhehehheehhehehehehehheehehehheeheeheheee.

Its going to be hard to play this. At school it was a crush nothing more. We barely spoke, at 6th form. Jon and Leanne were a couple ( lasted around 3 yrs if memory serves) And we spoke even less. Seeing as school is 9 yrs YES 9 yrs ago now.

FUCK IT the past is where it is and I wil treat this chance meeting as a fresh start and see what happens, after all i barely know the girl and vice versa. NO NOT THE CHOCOLATE TREAT

3 weeks on from download day 3....

2007-07-01T06:22:00.000Z

Seeing as my trip to Download was 3 sundays ago, I can ask myself what have I been doing. Well a bit of Flames Of War, tho this isn't a recent game was some time in May i took these photos. It was a epic battle between Italians and British forces.
Steve with his piss poor british boys
Kelv looking on in dismay
And Sai checking up on a rules

Im attacking Right - Left

A rare hit from Artillery sends that M10 in smoke.
My lads are moveing up
And we called it a draw as steve had to catch the bus home that day. If the game went all the way it must likely would off been a win for the Mighty Italians.
And more recently I have at home been playing Company Of Heroes. On my PC
And ist just a couple of action shots with me playing as The Germans.

Other than that I shall be off to The Pink Toothbrush on Friday 6th. So expect the usual. Without the drink of course, after all The Brush is expensive.

Download:.....:Day 3 and home

2007-06-21T00:09:00.000Z

I was clearing out the tent and all the booze was chucked. had my 2nd to last bannana and i was on my way for the 1st band of the day. I intended to be front row for killswitch. Which was some 6 hrs away

1st up "Parikrama" from India. must say the are so much better than the stuff thats watched round the flat.
+ the dress like heroes

had to put up with a few more mosh loving bands but being sober i could handle it.
I like how the bird is the only 1 looking at the camera
Starting to fill Ill now. Must be down to the lack of fluids, food, being crushed alot and not being drunk
I look impressed hey

Oh and maybe im sick of have twats dropped on my head, so by looking round when 1 is incoming some CUNT steals my spot

That thing in the red hair looks like a girls but makes sounds with her vocal cords that only a man should make. it made me feel even more Ill, as she would make these sounds inbetween bands
NOT MY HAND, A COCK-SMOKERS. Not a bad shot tho really
More crushing and feeling the most sickest ive been in all my life.

Killswitch were up next but i couldn't take it. this was my high note. Soon as these fellas were over so was I
Im sure he was looking at me off camera. When i had both fists in the air.
Thats it im off
Back to the tent to drink chlorine filled tap water that makes me gag. + nearly all i have left to eat.

I can here Killswitch just fine from here and at least im starting to feel better now. Apart from the cramp of a lifetime in my left leg
This book has helped me get thru this.
Watched most of Iron Madien on a big screen away from the main stage. the cramp has slowed my walking speed loads.

This lot don't mess around nethier, they have there own tank

And a 20ft tall fully moving zombie solider
The next morning, and the state of my vest. Mother washed it and it didn't come out so she will try bleach and see how that goes. Otherwise I will be wearing this to reading in shown state.

No more pics as i buryed the camera in a bag.

Basicly the que for a bus to Derby was an hr long. On the way i spotted a HSBC in some small town. That got me thinking If i can find the HSBC in Derby in time before my train i might be able to get some cash out over the counter. I duely did with some time to spare and got me £20 YAYAYAYAY Water must have fresh water. No need to bunk the train at Liverpool St now

( tho in hindsight i would of got away with it )

So will I be going next yr ?. Maybe I have some time to think about it yet.

Gallows are playing Reading too this yr. Interesting.........

Download:.....:Day 2

2007-06-17T21:34:00.001Z

Well i slept awful, damn planes. I tented up right under the flightpath of some guff airport near to Donnington.

1st order of the day is checking in on lost property (no joy), and then a phone call to Agent J to get me phone cancelled at least. The cards will have to wait till i get home

The view has improved back at camp.
Stock check. This is all I have to last me till i get home monday afternoon. So I better make it last.
Alchool wise im more than ok
Needed the bottle for water so the vodka goes in here

It worked really well too
Im not moving out till 3. so am chilling reading a book and my choice of music between the main stage acts. As I can here them good from here
Got my drink ready for later
And here it is ready to sneak in past the guards

This lot is Anathema, On before Gallows who Im really here for

Hope this a girls flab
Water please!!!
This guy loved the drink. Seem i offer it to men far to often.

Frank Carter. Lead Vocals
Other band members are:

Laurent Barnard Guitar
Steph Carter Guitar
Stuart Gili-Ross Bass
Lee Barratt Drums
As im lacking some females today this 1 will have to do for now. Ant she a cuteie

She looks even better in this 1

" Will Someone Shoot That Fucking Snake "

Gallows are on a USA tour now but will be back for Reading. And yes I will make sure im there to see em again.

He had to get back to the stage at some point

Its well hot in here. Good thing im in my old mans vest
Don't remember her
Nice

Maybe i should get a job with this mob

Well im stunned and its back to the tent for a refill

"A Girl" By Ben Harry Woodward

"Another Girl" By Ben Harry Woodward
"Sitting Girl and topless male friend" By Ben Harry Woodward
"Girl in a crowd" By Ben Harry Woodward
Cheers fella. Off to the main stage now for Linkn Park headlineing. I have to put up with Marilyn Manson. Most of his stuff is not my thing
Embrassing as i called these fellas german,

There are Norweign. So my Die Hard line of Shest un in festa was lost on them. Note "Shest un in fetsa" is not spellet correctly

The old focus on a pack of crisps when im faneing attention on this girls arm. Hope its a girl anyway

Slayer was on before MM

I love being swamped by men
Starting to piss me off now crowd surfers
Playing Spot the Girl

Wheels are starting to fall off.
Ill be seeing alot more of u my dear

And shockingly i dont remember her at all. Other than the pics. Strange yet i know other stuff. Maybe i can claim she gave me a necking and that it was so bad i erased all memory of her.

Yeah right
Get your finger out of my arsehole Gary

Crapy devil horns
Cheers fella

Yes she is a real dream. Why the fuck don't i remember taking pics of her.
Yet i do of this guy. WHAT THE FUCK
Hey he helped pull me out of the mosh pit yesterday. - jeans.
This fella knows the score

Look at me
YES!!!

BOO
YAY
If i wanted to take the WWP crown pulling on that would seal it
Token Female security
I kept waveing at her till she posed.

She even squrited water in my mouth. I died and went to heaven in that moment

Nice hair
Better vest

1 drops more will take his place

Not sure why but I will drop about 3 songs into the linkn park set. maybe its down to haveing twats dropped on my head

Catch the birdy.
MM is over and its the wait for Linkin Parkhole
Small bottle wars started. Untill

lots of women did this
There were far better birds, but i didnt want to look like a total perv and snap them all. just this 1 thats below average
Did the "Im gonna be sick Fake" to get out of the masses and head back to the tent.
The Token view from the tent, main stage is just past that tree.
I couldnt be botherd to move after. I should of as i now regret missing Frank doing a set in some DJ tent thing at 11:30pm. Checked the net later at home and it was great.. so sad.

Have been thinking of doing this for a couple of yrs now. And now its time to call it for good

As of tomorrow i am going Striaght Edge.

I will never drink again.

Download:.....:Day 1

2007-06-12T22:54:00.000Z

Need to transfer this into plastic bottles. Was up till 12:00 sorting stuff out, an i was to be up at 16:00 for the train to work. Oh thats gonna be a hoot!
My trademark mirror shot but from work after a long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long shift

Those of u that know Ultimate Steath know how much of a nice spot this is to do it
I found me a sweet spot after treaking for ages around the campsite. Its a RPG round away from the main stage.
Its a shoddy build, the tent pegs won't go into the ground at all. So any strong wind and im tentless.
It didn't say in the brochure how stunning the view is from the tent opening

At last my 1st drink the standard sugar free voidka and breadbull.
And now its time to mix somthing semi-special up
All 4 sprits and a dash of pepsi max. No its not The Drink Of Doom, The Semi Drink Of Doom

SoCo, Captain Morgan's and orange juice. Smooth

Yeah Right
Just checking in with Jobber reguarding the weather reports. and its all good wind wise.

Moving out time for a slash and to the Main Area
It smells better than it looks.

If only i was gay

Good idea

I asked for £30 quids worth at £3.80 i think they were at. So counting em there i have at least 10 + the 1 i just used + a couple of quid change. It must of been the barkeep likeing me.
Cider baby... YEAH!

Hinder, I belive these chumps are

I started up a Argnetina Chant up but no one was joining in

Little did i know what was soon to be coming up. + how much i begain to despise these fools for there devil horn signs. Such crap. you want to be different by dressing so and likeing music that will never rule the world. Sheep all showing the same hand gestures. Ill show em

Break between bands

Gaz that shat Man U fan. Oh and the 2 actually in the shot are South African's ( or somewhere Southen )
So is the blonde. cute hey

Foreigners and there funny ways

MEGADEATH, and the wheels are starting to fall off now

I was in for my 1st taste of a Mosh Pit

Crushing

Ethier my jeans are falling down or being pulled down around now.
And no thats not a biker getting friendly with my Anus

Its too much now and i want out

If u get the yellow T-shirts attention they will pull u out.
At some point i did and got out minus my jeans

Back at the tent and after the trek past thousends of people in my blue city boxers. I find a deeply depressing fact. Wallet and Phone were in said lost jeans. I have everything else of value in a small bag that I tie onto my arm (I.E. train ticket, camera, oakley's, fake ipod Etc)

It seems I must of forgot to place wallet and phone in there as well.... Time to race to lost property and check back at the main stage in some small hope 1 or all 3 things will turn up. Its only around 4pm.

And now its midnight. No joy I am well up the creek without a paddle now. A Kind Scotish lady from lost property gave me £10 so i can at least get back to Derby on Monday morning. Just have to get thu Sat and Sun yet. Am really thinking that going solo here and getting so wrecked by 3pm was maybe not the best of ideas.

Still i will try and sleep and see how things are in the morning.